It’s a well known fact that comparison really is the thief of joy, so why oh why do we spend our down-time scrolling endlessly through other people’s posts and looking though the social media window into their lives!?

I’m sharing a little mini-series this month inspired by National Stress Awareness Month (you can read my last post here) and today I want to talk about comparison and the stress that it brings. We are all guilty of it, and in the age of ‘influencers’, product placement and even non-disclosed advertising, it can be easy to get sucked into ‘inspo’ posts, without really understanding or getting the whole picture.

Comparison is the thief of joy because it fosters competition more than community, and as such jealousy is often lurking on the sidelines as its partner in crime. Your community should build you up, be your cheerleaders and fill you with pride,  not fill you with dread!

You can’t compare apples with a horse, and as Albert Einstein is quoted to have said “Everybody is a genius. But, if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

So I’d like to ask you today, when was the last time you focussed on you and your goals, and actually took a look at what YOU want? Just like being a genius, you can’t judge whether you are successful depending on someone else’s criteria.  

So if you find yourself getting down about someone else’s “success”, take a moment today to ask yourself the following questions to help define your own idea of success!

  • How many hours a day/week do I want to work?
  • How much money would I like to make? (or. How much money do I NEED to make?!)
  • What are my non-negotiables?
  • What does my dream day look like?
  • Where do I work, and when?

I bet that every single one of your answers to those questions are different to mine, and most other people we know. We all have different ideas of joy, priorities and values, which means each of our ideas of success are different!

Yours might include hiring a cleaner, or an accountant. Maybe you hire a VA to do your contracts or tidy your inbox? Maybe you consider taking Fridays off a success, or its working extra hard to afford that all-inclusive holiday of a lifetime!

Let’s stop comparing ourselves with online strangers, and to take a yoga analogy, concentrate on our own mats. What can we do to build ourselves up, and then cheer on our community?